On a daily basis I am reminded that we are in the  midst of a mental health crisis with our children.  Pediatricians across the country and in Massachusetts are  seeing record numbers of mental health issues in children  and teenagers. Attention Deficit Disorder is on the rise.  Bipolar Disorder has increased in all age groups.  Depression and anxiety are also seen in dramatically higher  numbers. And that is only part of the crisis. Child  psychiatrists are in short supply. Psychologist’s  practices are full. And most recently, the medicines that  were in common use were restricted in use in children.  This situation was recognized in 2002 by the Bush  Administration’s New Freedom Commission on Mental Health.  The Commission concluded that the Mental Health system was  under funded and in “shambles”. Two years later the  situation is worse. What can we do about it?

It is time for all of us to recognize that there is a  crisis in mental health, particularly for children. Once  we recognize the problem perhaps we can try to make  government officials and health care insurers more  accountable to work towards a solution. We need more drug  treatment centers for teens and children. (Presently,  there are none for kids under 18!!) We need more child  psychiatrists and psychologists. (Currently it doesn’t pay  for people to do all the therapy needed.) Meanwhile we all  need to ask, “Why are we having so many mental health  issues in our children?” The answer may be difficult.  Perhaps as we ponder this question we can come up with  answers that may help children in the meantime. Here are  my suggestions.

1. From a young age we need our children to learn coping  skills. Kids need to learn how to handle their emotions.  recent Newsweek article suggested that our children  receive so much so easily in early years that they  have a hard time coping when things come harder when  they have to work for it themselves. Maybe this is true –  maybe not. Nonetheless, we need to help our children to  work through their own emotions early on so they know how  to do it themselves when they are older. Many times we, as  parents, try to move kids past their emotions. For example  when a pet dies we often replace that pet with a new one.  What we really need to do is let our children work through  their emotions on their loss of a pet. It is important for  kids to grow up learning that someone won’t always be there  to rescue them from their emotion.

2. We need to increase interaction with our children and  keep interacting with them as they grow. Turn off the TV  and the computer. Play games, go outside, and do things  together – young & old.

3. Teach our kids tolerance and inclusiveness. Not  everyone should fit into the well established molds  our society is creating. We need more than jocks and  cheerleaders. We need musicians, artists, dancers and  clowns. There is a diverse world of people with diverse  world of skills and living in a diverse world of color  and culture. We need to expect it and respect it so our  children do too. Then few children are isolated by “not  fitting in.”

4. Recognize our children’s real skills. Don’t push the  sports if your child really doesn’t like it or isn’t good  at it. Expose your child to a spectrum of activities.  Find their true interests and skills over time. Then help  them build their ego around it. Too many kids get hurt by  trying to fit into the molds society or parents are setting  for them. Let your child make his/her own mold.

5. Recognize the signs when your child isn’t coping. Is  your child isolated? Alone? Withdrawing? Is he or she  causing trouble in different sectors of his/her society?  Is there trouble at school? Is there trouble with friends?  Is your child giving up? Not caring for his/herself?  Recognize the signs and seek help early.

6. If you live in a home that suffers from some form of  abuse – seek help. There are organizations such as HAWK  that helps families in such situations. Even if you are  the abuser, seek help. I have had the experience where  an abusing father recognized his problem, sought help and  saved his family.

7. The mental health crisis is reaching too many corners  of our society. It is time for all of us to recognize  this so we can diminish any shame that prevents people  from getting help. We need to reach out and help when we  can. And we need to hold our children in safe, secure, and  positive places so their mental health has the best chance  of staying well.